raise. the. bar.

i'm almost 30.

i know everything.

ok now that that's out of the way, let's continue.

 

(see...30. check out the gray hair. ridiculous)

 

in my almost 30 years of life, i have learned quite a bit.

i am a very in depth person and i listen a lot.

when i was 17, not so much! short example:

i was filling out an application at subway,

2 guys came in dressed in all black,

my first thought, "hmm they look like robbers",

they robbed the joint, i filled out my application,

they left. i was clueless.

the end.

 

that taught me to be more aware of my surroundings ;)

 

since i have been very young, i have had the notion to

RAISE THE BAR.

raise the bar for myself that is.

hopefully others will follow.

somedays though, it seems the complete opposite!

 

i look around and see too much.

way too much of what i call "lazy".

yes i am totally guilty of this on occasion.

though don't get me wrong, i've also learned there is a lot of good

that comes from being "lazy".

it isn't necessarily a derogatory term, not in my book atleast.

i think it's healthy to an extent to bask in the "laziness",

let our minds and bodies relax from time to time.

i have learned to appreciate that these past few years.

there is also a difference between being

lazy and relaxing.

 

 i've gotta say though,

society is taking a dive off the deep end!

the one thing that drives me up the wall,

technology.

OH.m.g.

i can't really speak very nicely on this subject cause really,

it gets me all stressed out and

i'm not trying to make enemies either.

though if you really want to, i'll debate you to death ;)

 

i will challenge parents to this though:

limit the time your kids are on their video games,

their ipads, their phones, YOUR phones, their DS's...etc.

 

don't get me wrong here, we have 2 iphones, 2 ipads,

2 home computer, 2 DS's, a PS3 and a leapfrog.

no shortage of electronics around here!

but our kids aren't allowed on our phones unless

they are somewhere like the dr's office or somewhere

that the wait is too long.

they are limited to 2 -30 minute sessions on their ipad per day

(not counting school apps...like math flashcards, geo apps etc)

we limit TV too. on weekends, TV is off by 9 or 10 am.

they play in the front yard. or in their rooms.

they learn actual problem solving skills in real life.

they also have chores!

 

GASP. i can't believe how many people are shocked

that my 9 year old does dishes (by hand) once every day,

or my 7 year old picks up dog poop every day,

and God forbid my 4 year old wipes the table off,

makes his own bed and organizes our entry way...every day!

it's not easy on my part to be constantly delegating and then...

following up with them to make sure they did their chores,

 but it is my job, as a mom,

handed down from generation to generation,

to teach my kids the ways of life.

i also make sure they stay active and healthy.

and yes, that means they get in trouble,

they bounce the balls in the house,

they rollerblade on the tile in the kitchen,

they drive me crazy,

but let's not forget, that is part of life!

 

Here are some of my favorite pics of my little

monsters just...being kids. playing. learning.

 

 

 

 

i think we can all agree that the above pictures look

a lot better than this one:

 

(the day after Christmas was free range to play on all

their new toys ;)

 

how can we as a society shove "babysitters" like our phones

in our kids' faces so they will be quiet,

then wonder why in 5-10 years our kids are in trouble,

or they don't communicate well,

or they are lazy...or i could go on and on.

 

my point here is, think about the future.

think about what we are doing to our kids.

 

i remember some of my first jobs:

helping at a day care with 15 kids for 2$ an hour.

(i rode the bus there after school and walked home around 5,

i didn't call anyone for a ride. i was responsible for myself)

shoveling horse crap for 5$ an hour.

(ya not my favorite! but i wanted nicer "namebrand" clothes

than what my parents could afford at the time, so i did my share!)

working at a pizza place for 5$ an hour.

(at this time, i was a sophomore in high school, i played basketball and worked, all at the same time.

i also maintained a 3.3-3.5 gpa all through high school.

on days i didn't have a ride to work, i called the tracks bus and

paid for it with my OWN money. this job was a necessity for me.

i needed it to pay for my car insurance!)

 

i didn't list all that because i wanted a pat on the back.

trust me, i'm not that type of person.

i listed it because i have worked with 16-22 yr olds,

and while some are amazing,

others have actually lowered the bar.

it's almost as if they feel like they are owed something.

like they are "owed" a job.

give me a break!

those that have worked with me know that i expect them

to step up & handle their business!

there is no reason a perfectly capable teenager can't walk

just a little bit faster or work just a little bit harder.

 

i tell my kids all the time...

100% is what i expect from you.

110% is what i want you to expect from yourself.

i ain't raising no 10 percenta's.

lol jk, inside joke :)

 

ok moving on ;)

there are some people who really have stood out in my life.

some in the past, some current.

these are people that had no idea we were watching them,

they didn't have any clue we were learning from them.

 

for starters, my parents.

 

we weren't raised to get what we want whenever we want.

we were raised to work for it!

i never understood the pressures of being a parent,

working 2-4 jobs at a time,

keeping kids in sports etc etc etc.

now i do.

and i've only recently learned this since i currently 

have 3 kids in 4 sports.

 

my dad worked his ass off. he was gone by 5 every morning,

home by 5/6.

he was tired, grumpy and raising 3 kids while

my mom worked nights.

but he gave us all he had, always.

thank you dad for teaching me the value of hard work.

now i understand why you were so grumpy lol.

as a mom and grown up, i look around and see a lot of men

who wouldn't raise kids that weren't theirs.

but you did. you rode that rollercoaster with us.

and even though the ride was rough, we learned a great deal

from you. i think my best qualities come from you and mom.

 

my mom worked anywhere from 1-4 jobs at a time.

ok, as a woman and mother, i'd like to say that was

probably hard as hell!

cause not only are you working, but your dealing with

kids calling you to tattle tale,

meals to cook, transportations to arrange...

but my favorite thing was when my mom

was home in the mornings,

she always made us breakfast, homemade.

french toast, eggs, bacon, biscuits and gravy, cream of wheat.

thank you mom for working for us and for all those times that

you were home and you showed us your love through your cooking.

it may seem small but it wasn't.

thank you for teaching me to walk from one room to another with

something in my hand. "if your already going that way,

take something with you"

it's a huge help when it comes to keeping my house clean.

thank you also for showing me that life goes on even after death.

i don't know anyone who has suffered the losses you have,

yet you moved ahead with your life.

it's helped me move ahead with mine.

*also i have to add: you told me when my princess was born,

"wake her up by 7 everyday. then she'll be an early riser and you'll

never have problems getting her up"

still, that is one of the best pieces of advice ever! so, thanks ;)

 

my mother in law is another great example.

the number one thing i learned from her is
"take care of your man".

she raised a really awesome son and i'm lucky enough to get him ;)

thank you lupe for showing me the importance of waking up early

with my husband and making him breakfast before he is off to work.

he told me once that he always thought that was cool that you did that for your boyfriend cause a lot of moms would just sleep in.

 

my sister in law has 4 of the most amazing kids ever.

ok i'm a little biased but for real, they're adorable.

she has really restored a lot of faith i have in people.

she is probably the most giving person i've ever met.

thank you ellie for reminding me how important it is

to think of others. you are a great friend.

even though you have 4 kids under 5,

you still find time to remember others AND

you have raised the bar on homemade crafts and

you've given me so much inspiration. 

(to which i might add, you were doing awesome craft stuff

 WAY before pinterest was ever created. i love you :)

 

Cathy you are one of the best examples of a mothers true love.

there is a italian quote that says,

"amore di madre, amore senza limiti"

it means:
"a mothers love has no limits"

thank you for showing me this. without going in to detail,

you know what i'm talking about. kudos to you for never giving up.

and i know you don't like it, but i'm getting that tattooed on me.

it's my tribute to you and a reminder that even though society says

we should limit ourselves as mothers at a certain point,

it doesn't mean we ever give up on our kids. cause in

certain circumstances, we are all they have. love ya ;)

 

Christine i wish you were still here to read this.

you taught me a lot about listening.

i can remember the countless times i showed up at your house to

ramble on about something. you always listened.

thank you for showing me so much patience. just thinking of

you talking or yelling at christopher lol... it always makes me smile.

my favorite memory of you is waking us up with such a calm

voice in the mornings "good morning sleeping beauties".

i wake my daughter up like that every morning.

thank you for dragging us to church even though you knew we

were probably out doing something bad the saturday night before.

i never felt judged by you. i miss you all the time.

 

Toni, to this day, you are one of a kind.

"you can do anything"

that is what you have taught me.

no matter what is going on in your life, you always put good karma

out into this world.

thank you for showing me not to give up. you are a person who

stands by her beliefs, you are generous and loving...

and you have a bigger heart than most people i know.

i hope i make an impression on my daughters friends the way

you have done for yours. i love you (and Pat too :)

 

and more currently,

my nephew.

 

he just got a new job doing construction. he is one of the most

responsible kids i know! he's got a beautiful girlfriend

and 2 pretty little girls.

he just got himself a house too. we are really proud of him.

thank you jon for showing this society that not all

young kids are lazy.

you have raised the bar on your generation.

when you didn't have a ride to

work and you rode your bike with a bucket of tools on it,

your proved yourself a hard dedicated worker.

you're a great guy, don't give in to the pressures of life.

keep moving forward :)

 

if you have read through that all, thank you.

all the people i listed are just a few, there are many more!

if you are in my life, chances are you've taught me something.

or maybe i've taught you.

either way, i hope we can all aspire to be like those who have set

a good example for us as we grew up.

i hope we can all remind each other to raise the bar in society.

 

and take a minute out to play with your kids!

 

 

.erin.